Smoke rises from the site of an Israeli airstrike that targeted the village of Khiam in southern Lebanon on Sept. 25, 2024. (Credit: Rabih Daher/AFP)
For about 10 days now, children in Lebanon have been facing unprecedented violence, while the conflict between Hezbollah and Israel, in parallel with the war in Gaza, has recently taken on the appearance of open war. Between the explosions of communications devices held by Hezbollah members last week (nearly 40 dead and 3,000 injured), the targeted Israeli airstrike in the southern suburbs of Beirut last Friday (some 60 dead) and the large-scale military operation in south Lebanon and the Bekaa (hundreds dead, thousands injured), what can be said to children? How can they be reassured?
How can the war be explained to them? The fact that tens of thousands of people have been forced from their homes in south Lebanon, the Bekaa and the southern suburbs of Beirut and have, in particular, taken over public schools (150 buildings have been made available) to seek refuge there. How, also, can they be provided with a minimum education when schools have been closed since Tuesday and the caretaker education minister, Abbas Halabi, decided on Thursday to extend the closure of public and private schools and universities until Oct. 7 and a large number of schools in south Lebanon, the Bekaa and the southern suburbs of Beirut will not be able to open their doors anytime soon?
L'Orient-Le Jour asked two experts for advice to help parents get through this period with their children. Clinical psychologist and psychotherapist Wissam Koteit looked at children's mental health in the face of war, while education expert at the UNESCO regional office in Beirut, Maysoon Chebab, spoke about the need to continue their education.
Reassure the child by recreating a reassuring routine
Preserving a child's mental health involves a series of creative attitudes to adopt, answers to the questions they ask, adapting the words to their age, their geographical situation and how they have been confronted or not with images, information or a war situation, Koteit said, while being careful not to give ready-made recipes.
Based on this, "parents should tell their child that their safety is their first priority." They should "help them formulate their feelings and thoughts, without minimizing or amplifying their words." They could also reassure them by telling them that they have already faced this situation, that they have gone through it and gotten over it, and that soon everything will be back to normal, advised the psychologist.
It is also necessary to "recreate a reassuring routine around the child" if this routine has been lost, in the event of a move or interruption of school. "Sleep is at the heart of this routine, linked to a series of reassuring habits such as reading a story or exchanging words with parents," he said. And if parents encourage their child to practice a sport or an activity, they should set an example.
It is also beneficial to emphasize that there are caring people and associations that are there to help them.
On the other hand, "it is essential to limit the child's and adolescent's access to social networks and television news, to keep them from being confronted with unbearable images," stated Koteit. Similarly, parents should limit their own time following the news and contain their emotions in front of the child because, depending on the situation, excessive anxiety on the part of the parents could have repercussions on the child.
When children ask why there is war and displacement, parents should respond with simple statements. For example: “There are people who want to gain power by force, but we do not agree, that is why we protect ourselves”; “We are looking for your safety, but soon we will return home.” Parents should also “avoid reacting in the heat of the moment or making long-term plans, such as planning to leave the country or rushing to the supermarket,” he added.
"If the child witnesses [a traumatic event], personal follow-up is recommended, knowing each child reacts differently to each situation," said Koteit.
Read, review your lessons, train your memory
Since schools closed on Tuesday, children have been exclusively with their parents. It is up to the parents to continue their education and protect them during this difficult period, stated Chehab. Parents must maintain a life routine that gives their children a sense of security. "Waking up and having breakfast at the same time, reading, playing, spending time with family is reassuring," noted the expert.
Similarly, studying and continuing one's education is an excellent way to avoid disruption to one's daily life. "Parents should therefore encourage them to read, review their lessons, do their homework, train their memory, if they cannot teach them new concepts," she emphasized.
This war has an undeniable psychological impact on the child, it is normal that they have difficulty returning to school and concentrating.
"Hence the need for their parents to provide them with emotional and psycho-social support, to show them that they are attentive to what they feel and concerned about their well-being," said Chehab.
Inevitably, she stated, "this return to school will be marked by the adjustment of the teaching process, by the study of alternatives to face-to-face teaching," at least in certain regions of the country, while taking into account certain parameters such as electricity and internet.
"A process that is already being studied by the Education Ministry," said the expert.
This article originally appeared in French in L'Orient-Le Jour.
